Don’t miss this, thriller fans!

This one is still picking up steam, but you’re not going to want to wait. Oh, unless you don’t like free books. (Weirdo) [Ed. Note: We do not support the author’s name-slinging.] Gripping Reads offers 29 books to choose from, or grab all 29! Murica! [Ed. Note: We do not support the author’s assertion that greed is an essential American characteristic. In fact, we’d really like him to shut the hell up. We’re trying to get subscribers here!]

Ah, yes, good point, whiny editorial staff. This is a “list builder” promo, so know going in that the price of the free book is your email address becoming part of the author’s newsletter subscribers’ list.

[Ed Note: Tell them the rest!]

Ah yes. I have a book in the promo, giving you a chance to grab The Beauty of Bucharest in exchange for joining the email list. This is a really good move because my newsletter absolutely ROCKS. [Ed Note: He’s right about that part.]

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Feel Like Falling In Love?

This one is a sales promotion, my friends, with 57 steamy books available, (Including Jelly Jars, by yours truly). And in case you hadn’t picked up on it, it’s called Steamy Reads for January.

Being a sales promotion there’s no need to join anyone’s mailing list, but you will have to part with some dollar bills. [Ed. Note: You literally just defined the word “sale.” Your readers are not stupid, and no doubt already knew that. But, okay. Carry on.]

This one ends on January 31, so there’s not much time left to get yourself something to keep you warm on these cold winter nights. [Ed. Note: Readers in the Southern Hemisphere may, of course, substitute the word “Summer,” even though most people aren’t looking to keep themselves warm during that season and the whole thing kind of breaks down at that point. This guy.]

And Finally…

Anyone want to buy an editorial staff, cheap?

[Ed. Note: Hey, guy! Lighten up! We’re just having a little fun. You know. Ha ha and all that? Sheesh.]